It's the Year 2025



October 1, 2025
Chloe Laughlin

President West at the Iowa caucus back in November of 2020

President West at the Iowa caucus back in November of 2020

October is here and it is a scorcher!

President Kanye West tweeted that he “might believe in global warming after all” due to the immense temperature fluctuation taking place this year. Though his comment was meant to be a joke, there have been multiple inside sources which say President West is about to launch a water conservation campaign in the U.S. due to the recently significant global climate change - even though West initially said he did not intend on putting money towards ‘anything like that’. It looks like the Gemini may have changed his mind.

It is astounding to think it was almost one year ago that Mr. West became our Commander and Chief. So much has taken place in these past months. Let’s take some time to unpack some of our more current political events in order to reflect on this past year.

West began his political career by endorsing and engaging in business with President Trump - during the Primaries President Trump was actively advocating for Kanye West (specifically over social media, where most of West’s supporters gain access to information on his policies and political stances). After months of their visible comradery, West has seemingly done nothing but put down the former president insisting that “No one could run this country the way I can run this country, not even the man before me.”

Politicians have argued that no matter how hard West works to regain international approval, the fate of the U.S. has never been darker in regards to overseas affairs. Many countries have been outwardly hateful and threatening towards the U.S. since President West’s election and the closed off borders Trump put into place don’t seem to be helping. As the only country in a cage of walls surrounding all its borders, there is a worldwide ‘lack of respect’ for the United States. However, the President has been using the controversy in his favor.

It appears that most of his questionable decisions are being used as a front for him to focus on more important details behind the scenes. The White House press secretary has been alluding to the notion of our Mars colony growing successfully under the leadership of Elon Musk. With all of the backlash surrounding the peace negotiation between the United States and Russia, it has given the Officials in the White House a chance to expand our work on Mars while news outlets are busy covering the Russia situation.

Never before in history have we encountered a public peace treaty like that of President West and the First Lady’s way of making amends with Russia. As we know, what seemed like a healthy bond between former President Trump and the Russian Government turned sour during Trump’s Second Term in office. In order to avoid war or the threat of war, West set up an arrangement for Kim Kardashian-West to have sexual intercourse with the Russian Governor on tape. The negotiation would allow for all the proceeds collected from the sex tape to go to the Russian Government with the goal of amending damage that has been done between the two countries.

Kim Kardashian-West released a statement saying it “was something we all agreed upon” and that she in no way feels “used or pressured into a situation she is uncomfortable with.” Her final statement after the video was released is that she believes it is honorable to be willing to do absolutely anything for one’s country. Much of the country is divided on how they feel this situation was handled.

The colonization of Mars going under the radar has given the U.S. an upperhand in universal expansion and as far as West’s candidacy is going; it appears that the Mars territory may be the only saving grace for the United States. If we play our cards right, it looks like Mars could become an ‘American’ planet. Will living on Mars be inevitable future for the U.S.? With France, Russia, and China also taking up residency on the planet we may end up in an intergalactic battle for the majority of land.

Elon Musk left for Mars 6 months ago to head up the expansion, leaving his wife, Vice President Grimes, behind in the states. A major success for the United States is having the first female VP in history. This is one of the many groundbreaking firsts that have already taken place under Kanye West’s reign. Another first being the mandatory White House and Congress restricted dress code allotting only items belonging to the ‘Yeezy’ label. West passed down the Yeezy Enterprise to his eldest, North, on her 10th birthday and she has been running the company ever since. But have these ‘firsts’ been enough to change the polarizing political climate?

More and more states are declaring themselves as ‘anarchist friendly’ which has clearly upset the President - West has tweeted in the past that he “has no respect for those who do not respect [his] title as president”.

The nation is clearly divided and that has been proven by a majority of people boycotting Kim Kardashian-West’s ‘Freedom and Fitness’ Program which she launched in recent months. The goal of the First Lady’s campaign is to encourage young people to go on dietary supplements and continually “#doyoursquats”. Mrs. West says she would like to see a more fit and sexy America. Her campaign mentions the ‘freedom to be fit’ and she encourages young women especially to get involved.

Changes can already be seen in the meals provided at school and the dietary smoothies available as snacks in all nationwide vending machines. Gym memberships have gone up across the United States recently more than they have in the past 8 years. However, this campaign has also seen a shocking amount of opposition. White House critics and anti-West advocates are all boycotting this idea of a ‘fit and sexy’ America by intentionally gaining weight and eating unhealthily with the intent of proving their disapproval. Many find this campaign classist as very few cities in America can afford dietary supplements and fresh produce while supporting themselves on minimum wage. All of this ultimately begs the question - will minimum wage cover dietary supplements while living on Mars?